Architecture Puns and Jokes

Architecture puns …because who doesn’t like a good “architecture joke” to lighten the studio mood!?! Well it turns out that there are some absolute stinkers out there, but we’ve narrowed down what the internet has to offer to form the below list of 31 as close to “acceptable” architecture humor as we think you’re going to get.

From architecture pick up lines to clever plays on words …please feel free to add to this list in the comments below


Architecture Puns and Jokes

Architecture Puns & Jokes…

  1. Who did Noah hire to build his boat? …An arkitect of course!
  2. Why don’t architects get into heaven? …Jesus was a carpenter.
  3. How do you get an affordable minimalist makeover in New York? …Leave a window open.
  4. I used ‘veranda’ as an expletive. It was a porch choice of words.
  5. Why do Architects laugh three times when they hear a joke? …Once when it is told, once when it is explained to them, and once when they understand it.
  6. I refuse to make my own sandwich. …I rely on sub contractors.
  7. The kid who microwaved his toy construction blocks ended up with Legoo.
  8. How do construction workers party? …They raise the roof.
  9. The retired earthquake expert began a new career as a consultant specializing in large shopping centers. He was known as a size-mall-ogist.
  10. Marble is a valuable building material and should not be taken for granite.
  11. Aspiring HVAC contractors should make sure they have their ducts in a row.
  12. Why did the Egyptian architect go to jail? …He was caught planning a pyramid scheme.
  13. Plumbers have a multi-fauceted personality.
  14. Did you hear about the architect who had an unhealthy obsession with designing intricate shopping malls? …He had a complex complex complex.
  15. What did the announcer scream when the wooden model of the Hindenburg burst into flames? “Oh, the mahogany!”
  16. A Physicist, an engineer and an architect are sitting in a taxi. …The engineer says: What makes it drive? The physicist says: Why does it drive ? And the architect says: Your fare will be 17.45$.
  17. Did you hear about the architect who only had aluminum sheets for stationary? …His plans were foiled.
  18. I was arguing with a construction worker. We were getting bogged down in cementics.
  19. How often did the architect have to put long narrow paths in his blueprints? …Hallways
  20. You’re like a cantilever girl. You left me hanging for more.
  21. I work with an amateur architect. …It puts a roof over my head, sort of.
  22. Just went to an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers.
  23. What’s the difference between an Architect and an Engineer? …If architects built all the buildings, they would fall down on their own. If engineers built all the buildings, they’d be so ugly, we’d tear them all down.
  24. Which famous 20th century Swiss architect changed his name to match his drinking habits? Le Corboozier.
  25. How do Church architects make sure they’re building the church properly? …They check the Cross section.
  26. I like Eames, Aalto I prefer IKEA.
  27. So, why is heaven considered to be a perfect place? …Because there are no architects to screw up the design 
  28. An architect knows …How to make a long story short.
  29. What’s the difference between a doctor and an architect? …An architect’s mistakes are there for the world to see, but a doctor buries theirs.
  30. …Having a parti with some models
  31. I like my coffee like I my poche; black
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